The Unholy Bean
I thought, if I even had a sip of it, I would shrivel up and die. Or be struck down by God Himself.
It’s illegal to drink “hot drinks” if you’re Mormon. Hot drinks are defined as anything derived from a tea or coffee plant. So, contrary to popular belief, Mormons are allowed to drink hot chocolate. But strangely, it’s not about caffeine, because, if that were the case, why do so many Mormons practically live off Diet Coke?
Because of this, growing up I was never around coffee. I was always told that coffee was evil and in my head I truly believed it was evil. I was so scared of coffee that even thinking about it made me anxious. I thought, if I even had a sip of it, I would shrivel up and die. Or be struck down by God Himself.
I remember this one time in middle school, when one of my closest friends told me his parents let him have some coffee every now and then. I was dumbfounded. Here was my friend, perfectly healthy, not struck by lightning, and yet he was drinking poison on a semi-regular basis.
Yes, I knew that my teachers would drink coffee, but I thought it was different for adults. They were just sinners, but for kids, coffee was a poison that would ultimately kill us and send us straight to Hell.
So, when I found out my friend had drank coffee before, it shattered my worldview. I even told him that he shouldn’t do it and he further pushed against me saying it was good and he liked it. I thought that was it for him. Any second now, he was going to drop dead in the middle of class and I would have to be the one to tell everyone it was because of coffee.
We ended up making a big enough commotion that our teacher came over. It was supposed to be silent reading time. When I told her about the atrocities committed by my friend, she just stared at me. Imagine a young me sitting there with my hands outstretched to my dying friend and the teacher doing nothing. My confusion was at an all time high.
All my teacher said was that she didn’t see a problem in it and left us to our own devices. With the addition that we should be reading of course. So there I was, reading my copy of Eragon, and mulling over this whole new world in my head.
My friend obviously wasn’t dying. He was fine, better than fine even, he could climb the climbing rope in gym class. And yet, here I was, never even touched coffee, and I couldn’t get off the ground on that damn rope.
Maybe coffee wasn’t an irredeemable sin. Coffee is addictive, but mostly because of the caffeine. If I wasn’t allowed to drink it because it was addictive, then why was I allowed to drink soda? That had as much if not more caffeine than coffee. Soda is even worse than coffee but that’s not what we’re focusing on right now.
The irony in all this is I am a manager of a couple coffee shops now. I probably drink more coffee than I should and yet I’m fine for the most part. Do I have a slight addiction? Probably, but there are so many worse things I could be addicted to. I used to hold such strong views about coffee, but fast forward 7 years and there’s few things I love as much as coffee.
Maybe the things we believe as kids aren’t always right. Back then, we were just trying to make sense of the world. Maybe we still are. Sometimes we get it wrong, and that’s okay. The things that once terrified us don’t have to define us forever. There’s always space to learn, to grow, to come back. After all, we’re all just trying to find our way in a world that rarely makes sense. Plus, I can pour some crazy latte art now.
Some of my other posts :)
The Art of Going Home Alone
There’s a certain kind of heartbreak that doesn’t come from being rejected, but from never really being considered in the first place. I’ve never been the first choice, the one who catches someone’s eye from across the room, or the one who gets picked without hesitation. I don’t think I’m unattractive per se, but I’ve never had that kind of effortless a…
Being on the other side of this world view is also odd. I was in high school when one of my teachers was trying to plan a pizza party and one of the students asked if we could get some coffee and he said "I don't believe in caffeine." Now I loved this teacher, however this threw me for a loop. Of course I asked him what he meant and he explained to me in simple terms what his religion thought of caffeine. I thought it was crazy at that time but I understood that it was a part of what he believed. I also wondered how he thought coffee was bad but he drank diet coke ever day. Ah I miss him though
never really considered how everybody has a different relationship with coffee! i love your writing